Imagine the relief and disbelief of receiving a diagnosis at 42 for a condition that had shaped your entire childhood and had gone unrecognized for most of your life.
Tyler Barnett of California experienced exactly that when he was diagnosed with autism at the age of 42.
Speaking to People, he explained that this diagnosis changed everything because he lived his life “feeling like an imposter.”
As a child, many considered him to be gifted, but at the same time, doctors diagnosed with a bunch of mental health conditions including anxiety, depression, and bipolar disorder. In fact, even Tyler himself, who works as a public relations specialist, tried to figure out what was going on with his brain most of his life.
But it wasn’t until April 13, 2026, when he was officially diagnosed with level 1 autism and Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). For him, it was the exact moment things fell into place.
Prior to the diagnosis, Tyler felt like he was looking on his own life from the outside, feeling a gap between him and those around him.
“I was watching a group of kids link arms and jump up and down and laugh…they were doing something from a movie I hadn’t seen or something. I was on the outside just watching,” he told People, recalling a childhood memory. “I didn’t really understand why they were doing that or why it was fun, but I felt like I didn’t get it or didn’t know how to fit in.”
Sadly, that feeling didn’t go away with time. Instead, it stuck with him throughout his adult life, too. Others advised him to try and blend in, which wasn’t an easy thing to do.
For the sake of fitting in, he started pretending in order to “make other people comfortable around me.” For him, that meant copying other people’s behaviors, something that simply didn’t come naturally to him.
Eventually, this led to something known as a “second nature,” and he no longer felt like himself.
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Over the years, he sought help from therapists, but none of them got to the bottom of the problem he’s been facing his entire life.
“I saw a lot of therapists, and the thing about therapy is you can’t therapize yourself out of autism,” he said. “You can talk about your life and your problems and your parents, etc., but this is not seeing the forest for the trees. So while therapy was helpful, it actually pulled me further from the truth.”
The therapies he has received throughout the years, including anxiety, depression, and even bipolar disorder, only pulled him away from the real cause of why he was experiencing what he had been experiencing.
“Internally, I was in so much pain, exhausted, confused, scared and hiding it all,” he said.
Following the autism diagnosis, Tyler took to social media, where he has a TikTok page under the username @millenialdad, and shared in an emotional video: “Today I found out that I’m autistic and I have ADHD…I always have, and nothing’s wrong with me.
“I’ve been mislabeled and mismedicated, and misdiagnosed. I have tried to figure this out myself and I’m so relieved.”
With the diagnosis came the relief because that constant need that he needed “fixing” faded away. “I couldn’t fix myself no matter what I did — and I tried a lot, for a long time,” he admitted. “And now I know there is nothing to fix…I am a zebra, not a broken horse.”
Eventually, he was taken off the meds for bipolar disorder.
“As I get back to my true self, I can see clearly I am perfect as I am. The world just couldn’t meet me where I was,” he shared with People. “Because when you understand autism and ADHD for exactly what they are, they can stop becoming a disability and become a superpower.”
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